You can really tell that winter has come to an end in this country, the insects are appearing all over the place, so the irritating little buggers (bad pun intended) have become the topic of today's installment, and I've not chose them because the word insect sounds a lot like 'incest'. >:( Now wash your dirty mind!
Bugs, when its not winter the blasted creatures are all over the place, but you can't help but wonder if there's something mysterious about them, I mean, look at the facts here, the tiny little sneaks seem to show up just about anywhere, just last week I found a tiny little beetle camping out on one of the upstairs walls, a silverfish on the carpet in one of the upstairs bedrooms, and a WOODLOUSE in the UPSTAIRS BATHROOM! How the hell can they possibly get to these places, sure enough that beetle could climb, but a silver fish (a young one at that, it looked more like a tadpole than any insect I've ever seen) and a woodlouse? They can't even climb so how the hell did they end up there!? I really can't help but wonder if insects have some kind of magical teleportation technology that we haven't yet discovered, either that or their like secret agents :o
^How'd you get upstairs you crafty bastards?^
But aside from the fact that they show up practically anywhere where the environment won't kill them, what are insects really good for anyway? Let's look at it this way, what do we get from insects? Well they kill pests... oh wait a second, if there were no insects, there wouldn't be any pests for the insects to kill because the pests are also insects! Without insects we wouldn't need any pesticide or any of that crap. So, another thing be get from insects? Well, we get honey from insects, but what is that really good for? Quite frankly, the only differences that would come from a lack of the existence of honey would be more people buying golden syrup, and a strangely named cartoon bear would have to find an new snack to keep his BMI over 35.
^Well, at least he's not biting the hand that feeds him^
Oh, let's not forget death. We get a whole lotta death from insects, sure not in this country (Britain, for those of you who haven't already guessed), but certainly in the more... exotic... locations. And I'm not just looking at the venomous insects either, I'm mainly thinking about one of my biggest fears - Bees and Wasps. I suppose I've got some kind of paranoia here, but I guess I can justify that. Having never been stung by a bee or wasp before, I can't help but try and steer clear of them, the last thing I want is to discover I'm allergic to their stings, enter into a severe case of anaphylactic shock and consequently die. Bee and wasp stings resulting in anaphylactic shock cause about 40 deaths a year in USA, so with a little bit of math, it works out that each year, 1 in every 783,080.1 people will die because of it. Sure, it doesn't look like the odds of me getting killed by a bee are very high at all, but I'm still not comfortable, being honest.
So this brings me onto my last point which is on wasps, they truly are useless. Wasps have two purposes in the world, number 1, to eat other insects, so yeah, pointless in that respect, I'm sure anyone would rather have a couple more annoying but completely harmless flies in their house each year than a potentially deadly wasp or two. oh and number two, is to get eaten by slightly bigger animals like frogs and badgers, all I have to say to that is... Good riddance you little bastards! I hope you get digested slowly! VERY SLOWLY. The only other thing I can say to that though, is just why the hell would you want to eat one of those things? Isn't it possible to stab your tongue with the stinger? Speaking of stingers, they're barbed at the end, so they won't come out of your skin easily at all... Ugh... *shudders*
^*shudders* Ugh... Just look at that... thing.... Yellow and black, the colours of danger.... But here... THEY ARE THE COLOURS OF EVIL!^
So now it's time for the 'what if' of the day:
WHAT IF: The Bee Movie was actually a true story?
Until next time, valued readers... Now BUZZ OFF! :D
~Negi~
Other stuff eats them and other stuff eats that and we eat them, most bugs (apart from wasps) hold up entire food chains :) still annoying buggers though
ReplyDeleteWasps are actually very important, there are some crops that have evolved to release pheromones that attract wasps when they're being eaten by other stuff, so the crops themselves are asking the wasps to help out, wasps are the best natural pesticide, and so long as they're treated well won't attack you.
ReplyDeleteThey are also extremely nutritious and removing the sting before eating is that big of a worry, though most people do. Several countries have insects have a big part of their diet and you can buy sweet insects in London, although they're extortionately priced.
Also woodlice and Silverfish can climb. I've seen both walking up walls before.